When Timmy and I initially parted back in Sydney, 2012 after the most enthralling, dreamy and lustful six months of our lives, we shared a mutual compulsion to continue our whirl wind romance.
As we stood together on the train station platform, holding each other tightly, we endured what we thought might be, our final hug. We were hysterical. Neither of us had experienced pain in any similar spectrum and I genuinely believe that at that moment, we both shared raw and very real, heartbreak.
We released from a hug and stood motionlessly as relazation sunk in even deeper. We may never speak nor see each other ever again…
Timmy handed me an envelope. I felt a slight glimmer of hope. Maybe this wasn’t a goodbye or at least, our last goodbye.
This day was the beginning of our communication via hand written letters. You will absolutely treasure a hand written letter. There is something so vastly sentimental about a pen on paper. Whether it’s the time taken to write or the excitement of American mail greeting you as you slump through the front door after a long and tiring day spent teaching your class, I’m not entirely sure. But you will feel it. You will treasure it. (As you know, they supplement as great evidence for your K1 fiancé visa application)
Communicating via snail mail is obviously not a plausible method for daily chats. You will rely on the internet and you will become aggressive when your computer savvy brother cannot ‘fix’ the dodgy connection which coincidentally works for him, just perfectly.
However, communicating via the internet was, at times, easier said than done.
The combination of time differences, work commitments and simply, the stresses and spontaneity of everyday life made communication challenging. At the beginning of our LDR we were both studying and able to commit to spending hours on FaceTime until the early hours of the morning however as our lives apart progressed and our careers began, the possibilities of late night skype dates diminished. We were therefore forced to explore other methods of communication during those five week days when FaceTime or Skype were not an option.
You will send voicemails and they will feel incredible. Just hearing their voice will momentarily fill that fleeting gap in both the distance and your heart, enough to send you to sleep with at least a smile on your face. You will feel that connection; the one that never left despite the distance.
The most meaningful methods of communication were those of surprise and suspense; an unexpected something. Some of which included:
A chocolate bouquet, surprise pizza (message on box included), teddy, Starbucks gift card for less lonely morning coffees, favorite books, hand written poems, cards, photos, chocolates, pjs for a better nights sleep and one of our favorites, a cuddle buddy.
Over the years we amplified all methods of communication to the point of literal exhaustion. We began to realize that FaceTime, in combination with every other communication device possible, was just not enough. Luckily, by which time, the gap between us was beginning to draw in and we were so close to the end of our beginning. The light was shining.
Stay determined. Stay strong and focus.
Continue your journey and close that gap.
If you haven’t achieved it yet, what do you have to lose?